


Of Spirits and Siren Songs

by PlagueDoctor31



Category: Evil Dead - All Media Types, Re-Animator (Movies)
Genre: Alcohol, Crossover, Drunken Shenanigans, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-30 23:19:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19413523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlagueDoctor31/pseuds/PlagueDoctor31
Summary: Ash decides to share some of his bourbon with Herbert. It does not go as expected.Dan is called in to help a friend. He is shocked and amused at what he finds.





	Of Spirits and Siren Songs

**Author's Note:**

> It's been TOO LONG since I've written something for you all, but don't worry! I finally polished up something for you all to enjoy, so read to your heart's content! ^_^

The first thing Herbert West saw when he looked up at his book was Ash standing before him with a proud smile on his face, and it only took a moment bottle to notice the bottle of amber liquid in the man’s hand, brandishing it like a trophy. He furrowed his brow, expecting an explanation but getting none.

With a soft sigh, he opted to humor the man, “What do you have there, Ashley?”

“Bourbon,” Ash answered plainly, still grinning from ear to ear like a child who found a secret treasure chest. Satisfied with the answer, Herbert hummed in acknowledgement and resumed reading.

Evidently, Ash was not content with leaving the conversation there as he plopped onto the couch right next to Herbert, “Don’t you want to know what kind of bourbon it is?”

“Not really no,” Herbert voiced his disinterest into his readings before being interrupted by the bottle being shoved in between his face and the words he was trying to read. He instinctively leaned away and scowled as he watched Ash wave the bottle in front of him. A laugh erupted from his partner as Herbert snatched the bottle away. _Fine then, have it your way…_

“‘Haggis Distillery; Vanilla Oak Bourbon Whiskey’” Herbert read aloud the label before handing it back to Ash “So? You act like I should know this brand.”

“The name isn’t important,” Ash smiled warmly as he looked upon the bottle as one would look an old friend “This was the first brand of alcohol, I ever had. Dad thought he hid it well enough, but I managed a sip. The drink of my childhood!”

“Really?” Herbert narrowed his eyes skeptically “Your childhood?”

“Er, well, my teenage years.”

Herbert raised his eyebrow at that.

“Okay, fine! My college years,” Ash admitted “What’s important is that I have a lot of fond memories of this drink. So when I saw the S-Mart here finally have some in stock, I knew I had to buy it.”

“And so you did,” Herbert observed the obvious before looking up at Ash’s smiling eyes that stared back at him.

“And so I did.”

They held their gaze together for several silent moments, Herbert still mostly confused about what on earth he was supposed to do about this. He rarely drank alcohol, and Ash knew this. It wasn’t that he was repulsed by it, but rather he was distrustful of the notion of lowering his inhibitions while under the influence of him. Besides, the amount of drunk drivers he’s seen come through Miskatonic General did little to help sway his opinion in favor of drinking.

Ash sprang off the couch with a suddenness that made Herbert blink in surprise, and he turned his head to watch his companion stride towards the kitchen. Curiosity coaxed him forward, and Herbert followed along, leaving his book behind. Ash was already rummaging through the cabinets when Herbert arrived, the bottle now resting on the table.

“You’re not seriously considering drinking that by itself,” Herbert furrowed his brow as he stared at the lone unopened bottle.

“I seriously am,” Ash confirmed with a grin as he pulled out a glass “Why? You jealous?”

“I am not,” Herbert frowned “I’ll be sure to avoid your drunken stupor in the meantime.”

“Oh I see,” Ash turned to throw a challenging look at him “Think I can’t hold my liquor?”

“From my experience, not many can.”

“Prepare to be proven wrong, then.”

Herbert couldn’t help but chuckle in disbelief, and Ash raised an eyebrow.

“You think you can do better?” Ash turned and grabbed another glass from the cabinet shelf, setting them both down by the bottle of bourbon before presenting them to Herbert. Herbert furrowed his brow, realizing what the other was insinuating.

“Come on,” Ash prodded “It’s not like either of us have anything else to do.”

Herbert conceded with a shrug, “No, I suppose not.”

Ash laughed in triumph as the two took their seats across from one another. As Ash grasped the bottle and opened it, Herbert gently took the crystal clear glass that felt smooth and clear under his touch. There was a slight film of dust as a result of the long stretches of disuse that he cleared away with a wipe of his tie. Meanwhile, Ash had poured himself a generous shot of the dark amber liquid, basking in the nostalgic scent of his youth a moment before holding the bottle out to Herbert. Herbert met his reach half-way by holding out his glass, and a similar amount of liquid was poured in. Herbert took a whiff as well, the slight burn of alcohol greeting his nostrils with the accent of the vanilla of its namesake. He had to admit that it was not an unpleasant smell.

The two men regarded each other and raised their glasses.

“Bottoms up,” Ash winked and Herbert, and the two downed their drinks.

|-----[-----------}---

Daniel Cain always enjoyed a quiet night in, reclining back on the couch with a book in hand as music softly played to drive away the silence of the night. It relaxed him, able to help him stray his mind away from more unsavory thoughts: his work, the past, those he’s lost… But that was in the past, he allowed himself to not worry at that moment in time.

Until his thoughts were interrupted by the telephone ringing.

With a furrow of his brow, Dan groaned as he placed the bookmark back in between the pages. It was late, and a phone call this late could only mean one thing. He reluctantly got off the couch and approaching the ringing phone.

“What, Herbert?” was the first thing he said as he lifted the receiver to his ear.

“Dan, I fucked up,” Ash’s voice was heard on the other end, and it gave Dan pause. The other man sounded so unnerved, easy to assume that something’s given him a fright. If something has gotten that man scared, something was _really_ wrong.

“Ash?” Dan voiced his concern “Back up a little bit. What happened?”

There was a pause on the other end of the line, “You drink, right?”

“Of course I do.”

“Have you ever gotten Herbert to drink with you?”

“... Ash? What did you do?”

“I…” Ash sounded reluctant to answer “I got him drunk.”

That took Dan by surprise, “You _what_?! Is that even possible?”

“Apparently it is!”

Something interrupted their conversation as Dan heard shuffling on the other end of the line and a familiar voice calling out for Ash in a manner Dan thought he would never hear.

_Ashleyyyy~ Come out, come out, wherever you are!_

Ash’s breath quickened as he spoke in a whisper, “Look, can you just get over here? I have no idea how to deal with this.”

The call went dead before Dan could respond with the fact that he, himself, did not know how to handle a drunk Herbert West either. However, Ash was still his friend, and friends help each other, right? Thought, Dan was thankful that no dead bodies were involved this time, at least not any that he knew of. Perhaps he better get to their house as quickly as possible before that changes…

Dan didn’t know what to expect as he stood on the doorstep of Christchurch Mortuary and rang the doorbell. Music played from within, soft jazz piano and a crooning voice singing along. He didn’t know that Ash liked jazz, but nevertheless he stood there as the door open.

“Finally!” Ash exclaimed as the door opened to reveal him. Dan’s eyes widened at the sight of his friend. He looked absolutely bewildered and frazzled: hair mussed up and sticking out at odd angles, a faint blush over his cheeks (no doubt from the alcohol), clutching a half-empty bottle close to his chest.

“God, Ash, what happened?” Dan exclaimed while he scanned his eyes over the man.

“He wants more, Dan,” Ash raved “I told him he couldn’t have anymore, so he’s using every trick in the book to try to get it.”

“The bottle?” Dan eyed the bottle. Judging by the label, it was bourbon. A good brand too.

“Of course!” Ash reached out and yanked Dan inside “Look, you know Herbert just as well, if not more, than I do.”

“I can certainly tr--” Dan caught sight of a splotch on the crook of Ash’s neck “Is that a hickey?”

Ash opened his mouth as if to answer, but was cut off by a voice, the crooning voice Dan heard on the radio earlier. Dan furrowed his brow in confusion as to why a song would put a man like Ash on edge, until he realized something odd about the voice. Its volume did not match the volume of the instrumentals. In fact, the voice sounded like it was coming from the house itself. Adopting the same bewilderment as his friend, Dan allowed himself to be dragged towards the kitchen, to which they were stopped by the voice stopping and Herbert getting in their way.

“There you are!” Herbert proclaimed with a lopsided grin, and Dan’s jaw dropped at the sheer state of this man. The smile was one thing, but he looked completely dishevelled and uncaring about his current state. His own cheeks had a deeper blush and he looked upon the pair with half-lidded eyes. Dan knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t help but find the state that the great Herbert West was in to be funny. He bit his lip to stifle his laughter as Ash dodged out of the way of Herbert’s grabbing hands that made a beeline for the bottle.

“Ashleyyyyy,” Herbert pouted. That’s right, _pouted_ “I want more.”

“If you drink more, you’re going to get sick,” Ash retorted, holding the bottle out of Herbert’s reach.

“No I won’t.”

“Yes you will.”

Herbert pressed his cheek against Ash’s chest as his pout intensified, “You’re no fun.”

Dan was unable to hide his smile as he looked over at Ash’s embarrassed expression, “So how the hell did you manage to pull this off?”

“Well,” Ash recalled, running his fingers through Herbert’s hair to keep him docile “I may or may not have indirectly challenged him to a drinking game. We both took about 3 shots worth.”

“That bottle tells me you two drank more than that,” Dan observed the low level of bourbon in the bottle.

“Because I went to take a piss, and when I got back he was drinking straight from it! I pulled it out of his hands and got bourbon everywhere.”

“Did you at least clean it up?”

“Of course I did! That was when he was starting to get touchy-feely too, asking me for more booze.”

As if prompted by Ash’s words, Herbert giggled and flumbled with the buttons on Ash’s shirt. Dan already knew what was coming as he had no time to stop the small man from shoving his hands under the shirt and causing Ash to let out a yelp of surprise. Both men knew from experience that Herbert’s fingers can be as cold as ice at most hours of the day, even in the summer. Dan sputtered, barely containing his laughter now.

Ash frowned up at him, “Oh you think this is funny, do you?”

“I do,” Dan spoke through his laughter “On the phone you made it seem like Herbert turned into some homicidal maniac, but really he just acts like a regular affectionate drunk person. Deal with those numerous times at the hospital.”

“Then help me deal with it!” Ash squirmed and he used his free hand to push Herbert’s wandering hands down.

“Ash, it’s really not that hard. Put the bottle away and have him sleep it off. You really don’t need me here to help you with that.”

“Yes I do,” Ash plopped the bourbon bottle into Dan’s hands “Help me and get that as far away from the house as you can.”

“Aren’t you being a little dramatic, Ash? Herbert’s just acting different, that’s all.”

“Yeah, well, last time I had loved ones act differently, it turned out they were possessed and trying to kill me.”

Dan paused, his smile fading as he realized that was a real concern of Ash. While it was true that he has yet to encounter one of these “Deadites”, but from how Ash and Herbert described them, Dan could barely imagine how upsetting it would be to see one, what was once human twisted into some cruel mockery or imitation of what used to be a living breathing person. Sure, the reagent did similar things to the subjects, but those corpses acted like lumbering animals. Deadites could speak and think just like him. Dan shifted his gaze from the worried look on Ash’s face to Herbert, who looked content with resting his head against Ash’s chest and humming softly to the music as he held him. Letting out a breath, Dan put a hand on Ash’s shoulder.

“Hey, you and I both know that Herbert is stronger than he looks. Okay, maybe not stronger than alcohol, but I’m sure if anything tried to take his body, he’d give it a run for its money, right?” Dan looked at the smaller man and spoke up “Right, Herbert?”

“Yyyeah!” Herbert weakly cheered, looking like he could fall asleep standing judging by how content he looked leaning against Ash.

“Well…” Ash mulled over Dan’s words as he looked down at Herbert, slowly bringing up a hand to gently pat his head as he smiled, “You’re right. Even when he’s drunk, Herbert would be too much of a handful for Deadites.”

Herbert mumbled something incoherent, which caused both Ash and Dan to laugh together as relief washed over them. Glad that everything smoothed over, Dan held the bottle out to Ash, but the other man shook his head.

“Keep it, as a ‘Thank you’,” Ash smiled “Besides, I don’t think Herbert and I will be drinking again anytime soon.”

“Well, if you change your mind, you know where it’ll be,” Dan waved goodbye as he exited the house, leaving Ash to deal with putting Herbert to bed.

As he stepped out into the night air, Dan looked up at the Christchurch Mortuary. He was happy for those two, which surprised him. After he moved out, Dan pictured Herbert all alone in his laboratory, and yet there he was. It shocked him when he found out that his old roommate had gotten himself a new partner, but Ash and Herbert worked with a synergy that made it all seem like it was completely natural: Two stubborn men that care too much (even though one fiercely denies it). Dan had to admit, it made him jealous. It reminded him of the past, of other people who worked with him in the same beautiful tandem. It made him long for…

Dan eyed the bottle of bourbon and screwed off the cap, taking a generous swing.

“Hm, not bad.”

|-----[-----------}---

Ash stood by the window as he watched Dan drive away from the cemetery, reassured by their conversation earlier. However, Herbert was still drunk, and he was still a handful. That much was certain as he felt a pair of arms wrap around him from behind and felt a face nuzzling into his back.

“Ashley, can I have morrrre?”

Ash finally found it within himself to smile, “No Herbert, you can’t have more.”

Herbert paused before Ash felt the nuzzling continue, “Please~?”

Ash laughed as he maneuvered himself and Herbert’s arms to face him, “No, because I let Dan take the last of it.”

“Awwww, you did!?” Herbert pouted again. _Damn, those puppy eyes…_

However, with the renewed confidence from Dan, Ash was more than capable of resisting. He gently took Herbert by the hands and led him away from the window, smiling as his partner followed along with a confused expression.

“Where are we going?” Herbert followed up his questioning.

“To bed. It’s time for you to get some shut-eye,” Ash quickly tightened his grip to stop Herbert from pulling away “Hey now! Don’t be like that. I’m coming with you.”

Herbert blinked as he thought through it, “Me with you.”

Ash nodded, “Yep.”

“In bed?”

“Uh-huh.”

The grin returned to Herbert’s face as he squeezed Ash’s hands with his own, making the first move now by tugging them and leading Ash towards the stairs. As he stumbled to keep up, Ash quickly freed a hand to shut off the music for the night. Despite silence and sounds of the night now descending on the house, it did not stop Herbert’s drunken humming that transitioned into his crooning earlier in the night.

_“Think of the love we will be missin'/While bitter tears, they blind our sight/I just can't live without your kissin'/Let me make it up to youuuuuu tonight~”_

The melody followed the couple as they reached the second floor, and Ash had to say, Herbert was not a bad singer. He’s no choir boy, but the soft clipped consonants of his voice made it almost addicting to hear. The man loved to talk when he wanted to, and voice of his always made sure that people would pay attention. There were some days that Ash just wanted to listen to that voice all day, and now that he knew what his singing voice sounded like, Ash absolutely knew what he was going to bug Herbert into doing again.

As the final notes of the song came to a close, the two men found themselves at the doorway of their shared bedroom, to which Ash was promptly dragged inside of. Herbert’s guiding hands didn’t stop there, however, as he pulled Ash towards the bed and ungracefully pushed him down onto the end of the mattress.

“Whoa! Hey there, Herbie!” Ash laughed, caught off-guard by the display of force “Slow down a sec, will ya? You need rest.”

“Rest with you. In bed,” Herbert repeated as he climbed on top of the larger man, pitching the two of them forward. With a soft “oof!”, Ash landed on his back with Herbert on top of him. He was going to ask if Herbert was okay, but judging by the smiling face and half-lidded eyes that looked down at him, Ash was safe to assume that Herbert was more than okay.

“Well,” Ash swallowed, having a few ideas on how this scenario could play out “We’re in bed. Now what?”

Herbert pouted and kissed Ash square on the mouth, catching him by surprise with how sloppy it was as saliva smeared over Ash’s lips, “I missed you, Ashley…”

Ash was not sure why Herbert missed him, exactly, but he decided to humor him, “I missed you too, Herbert.”

That prompted Herbert to kiss Ash again, a move Ash was more prepared for as he tasted the alcohol on Herbert’s tongue. As their mouths moved together, the smaller man let out a noise that Ash was absolutely certain that he would deny in the morning. However, as amusing as it was, a moan like that only meant one thing. _Uh oh…_

Ash gasped as the other moved away from his lips, “Herbert, you’re horny right now, aren’t you?”

“So what if I am~?” Herbert spoke in between kisses as he trailed them along Ash’s neck. Nimble hands made quick work of Ash’s buttoned, and Herbert looked down at his chest.

“I missed you, Heart,” Herbert mumbled aloud as he bowed his head, kissing right over Ash’s beating heart with a tenderness that was unexpected at a time like this. Eyelids fluttered closed as the kisses slowly peppered their way down the chest, the stomach, and right too--

“Herbert, are you absolutely sure you want to do that right now?” Ash furrowed his brow with concern as he watched his drunken partner move in between his legs.

“And I missed you too, Boomstick,” Herbert lovingly tapped the lump that was Ash’s crotch “I missed you very much.”

Ash’s eyes widened as Herbert unzipped Ash’s fly and tugged on the pants just enough to expose more of Ash’s boxers. In no way did Ash expect Herbert to do anything like this, turning his nose up at the thought of his mouth going anywhere near that anywhere, and there he was. Alcohol really does funny things to people, huh? Herbert’s head dipped down for a kiss like before, and Ash closed his eyes for impact… Only for a weight to be pressed down against his crotch.

Ash opened an eye, not exactly sure what just happened, “Herbert…?”

Herbert was face down in between Ash’s legs, unmoving save for the warm ghosting of breath against his junk. Both eyes opened, and Ash furrowed his brow in confusion, pushing himself up into a sitting position.

“Herbert? You okay?”

With gentle hands, Ash maneuvered Herbert’s head to the side and blinked with surprise to see the man with his eyes closed, his glasses askew, and slowly breathing in and out. Herbert mumbled in protest to being jostled in a barely audible voice, but Ash could tell: Herbert was out like a light.

With a small smile, Ash carefully pulled the glasses off of Herbert’s face, folding them up and setting them down out of their way. He looked down at the snoozing man’s face, now peaceful with the blush still on his cheeks. It was an adorable sight, a sight Ash wanted to commit to memory because, Lord knows, he wasn’t going to see this again for a long time. With his flesh and blood hand, Ash carded his fingers through the soft brown hair of Herbert West, feeling sleep beckoning him to join his partner. He knew he should oblige. After all, Ash knew damn well he was going to get an earful the next day when Herbert wakes up with the hangover he’s going to earn.

Frankly? Ash didn’t mind that one bit.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope you all did as well ^_^
> 
> The song Herbert sings is called "Let Me Make It Up To You Tonight" by Roy Forbes. If you want to know where I got it from, look up a video on Youtube called "Jack and Malcom: Part 1". It's a clip from the show "Beggers and Choosers", with Bruce Campbell in it and if you haven't seen it... DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND WATCH IT
> 
> Let me know any thoughts or suggestions you might have. I always love reading what you guys have to say! ^_^


End file.
